Ode To My Spanx

An Oldie but Goodie of mine:


Oh, my Spanx. This love of mine, 

That keeps my belly flap in line. 

A marvel of science, so true, so fair, 

You have replaced my underwear.

In you my gut I cinch and stuff, 

with you I can feel thin enough.

I have 3 pairs, black, tan, and white,

that help me feel small and tight.

You give me wedgies, yes, it's true, 

and pinch my flab and stomach too.

My camel toe, on you I blame, 

I have to dig you out, with shame.

My inner organs you rearrange, 

and people seem to find it strange, 

when I unroll and pull you up, 

and tuck you under my large bra cup.

I'll take a shower and put you on, 

though the struggle always goes so long.

Since if I put you on while I am wet,

I end up tired and out of breath.

Come to think of it, I see, 

you really aren't that good for me.

So I'll say so long to you right here, 

and go back to my underwear.